|
Saturday, May 10, 2003
Welcome to the rare Saturday Blog! Here I sit at my desk waiting for the second half of graduation to start. We had this tornado on our campus last November, and this caused us to have to split graduation into two halves. The first half happened at 10 this morning and lasted about an hour. Now I sit here waiting for the second half which begins at 2. Why am I here? So I can broadcast graduation live on our campus radio station. Beats the heck out of sitting in the audience sweating perfusely in a stupid cap and gown. Once the second half of graduation is over, then I just pop up to the graduation place, unplug three cables and hit the road! Then we are done with the class stuff -- then next week, we get to have MEETINGS!
It's bloody hot here! Near 90 with humidity out the wazoo! It feels more like July in Mississippi than May.
Baby Ruth candy bars LIE to their customers! You look at the package and it says in bold yellow letters 20% MORE! So you think Wow, I'm getting 20% more than I did before at the same price. WRONG! Read the fine print -- it's 20% more than a 2.5 oz bar. Big whup! They haven't changed the size of the candy bar at all.
The kids were hacked that we were splitting graduation into halves. They wanted to graduate with all their friends. Boo-hoo! Today at the first half, there were still empty seats! If it were so darn important to see their friends graduate, why weren't the kids lining the walls while the first half graduated? Heck, we didn't have the huge families that some of the little darlins were whining about because they couldn't get all of them into the auditorium! Still empty seats. It looked like a Baseball game crowd.
Speaking of Baseball crowds, have you seen all the empty seats at the major league ballparks this season? The teams are wondering why -- I can tell them why. Who wants to pay up to $50.00 per ticket to sit in the Sun eating soggy Hotdogs (at $4.75 per) drinking warm beer (at up to $7.00/mug) and watching some guys making 25-30 million dollars a year play a game that kids play every day? Not Americans! I went to a major league game once -- sat in nose-bleed row (Halfway through the Alphabet the second time around) and I was BORED out of my mind! For three hours I got sun-burned to watch some little people wearing different colored uniforms run around a big green field. I would have had a better view, and a better time if I had watched it on TV. But I still would have been BORED out of my mind. Baseball is so sloooooooow. Maybe if you dropped some Acid or some Ludes you would enjoy the slow game more. But who in their right mind is going to blow $150.00 (not counting parking or gas) to take the family to watch a BORING game? Baseball is way overpriced for the excitement it offers. It's almost as bad as watching Soccer! I guess Baseball is like Soccer -- fun to play, boring to watch.
It's like watching Thug-Ball -- excuse me, NBA Basketball. Where four guys stand around scratching themselves while one player carries the rest of the team. Except in the case of the Lakers, it's two guys (maybe three) handling the games. Am I the only one that gets that Deji-vu feeling watching the Lakers? Instead of Jordan with the ball, passing to Pippin if Mike's cut off and Pippin to Horry if Pippin doesn't have a shot (the Chicago Bulls offense in their glory days) we get Kobe to Shaq and out to someone else having a great game! IT'S THE CHICAGO BULLS IN BLUE! Gee, can you say same old, same old? Okay -- you can't argue with results, but it would be nice to see some NEW OFFENSES! Something beside the pick and roll or the give and go or the take it to the hole. How about more than two passes? HOW ABOUT SOME DEFENSE?
Wonder what the folks in Alabama would say if it came out that Bear Bryant also liked to go to strip clubs?
Do you know what Alabama Football and a Maggot have in common? They both can live off a DEAD BEAR for 20 years.
The whole college football thing is totally nuts. For the salary of one Head Coach, a university could fund up to 100 Instructors! (Coach $30-million/year -- Instructor $30-thousand). And what do you get out of the deal? Once in a while one of your kids gets to the NFL -- maybe you might win a national championship. And you get a lot of drunk, screaming fans -- most of which never attended the school. Education? Who needs education? GIMME FOOTBALL! But what about the numbers that count more than Won-Loss -- GRADUATION RATES! Why don't we ever hear about how many Football players actually GRADUATE?
Lord, be with the folks in the Mid-west today as they endure yet ANOTHER day of severe weather and tornadoes! Especially Oklahoma City! Two tornadoes in three days, with one of them following almost the exact path as the F5 that tore through OK city in 1999! Statistically, a tornado is only supposed to go over the same spot on the map, in tornado alley, once every 10,000 years. In that case, does that mean that OK city won't have another tornado for another 20,000 years? Or is this like bettering the odds that there won't be a bomb on your airliner if you bring on a bomb when you board the plane. It works like this -- the odds of there being a bomb on same the plane you are about to board are very high! Like a million to one. But the odds of there being TWO bombs on that plane are 100 times that! So IF you bring a bomb on the plane, and don't explode it, you can be assured that there isn't another bomb that will explode because the odds are against it. Make sense?
An hour to go before the next broadcast! If you would like to listen then log on to www.muw.edu/wmuw beginning at 2:00pm Central Daylight Time and listen in! BLOG OUT!
posted by Eric at 11:06 AM
Friday, May 09, 2003
The final grades are in! The semester is almost over! All we have to do is get through graduation tomorrow, then WE ARE THROUGH!
I had to burn a kid today. She missed some classes because (she says) she has some kind of medical problems. (Listening to her description, my first thought was PID). Anyway, she came to talk to me yesterday. After listening to her I agreed to give her an Incomplete for the class. This would allow her to get well, and when she came back to school, she would have four weeks to finish all the work she didn't turn in to receive a grade. I filled out all the proper paperwork and sent the grade up the chain. However, my application for giving her an Incomplete was not approved at the administrative level. So I had to go to the administration building today and change her grade from and Incomplete to Failing. I really hated to do that.
See, this is college. And in today's college you're not going to find the traditional student anymore -- this person works full time not including school, plus (if she's telling the truth) she is SICK and the doctors took their own sweet time figuring out what was wrong with her. Plus -- other student's have children -- young children who get sick a lot. So sometimes, "stuff" happens and they just can't come to class. But all that aside they're now adults. They have paid their tuition already and if they want to waste their money and time that's fine with me. This isn't elementary school, or high school -- they don't HAVE to be here! So if they don't show up, that's okay. If they have a pretty good reason for not attending, that's okay with me too. But some of the folks here think this is a continuation of High School. So because of some of these people that want to "raise the standards" -- an "innocent" kid gets burned.
This is the part of the job that I hate. So it's a love/hate thing at the end of the year -- I LOVE the fact that IT'S SUMMER! I hate burning students -- even though they bring it on them selves, I still hate that I have to burn them.
I hope that you have a great Friday! Be ready for a rare Saturday Blog here tomorrow!
posted by Eric at 1:55 PM
Thursday, May 08, 2003
It's Thursday! One more day of classes/finals and then graduation on Saturday! Whoo-Hoo!
FINALLY the tornadic storms have left Mississippi -- but not before kicking ass all over the state! This last year hasn't been a good one for Mississippi weather-wise. Between the Hurricanes, and Tornadoes lots of damage and more than a few fatalities. Now that the storms are over, we have to deal with the flooding. Rivers and Creeks are rising and washing away folks who lucked out and missed the Tornadoes.
Mother's Day is this Sunday. If you have a Mother, take care of her -- give her something she will LOVE -- time with you! Someday, she won't be there anymore -- and you would give anything to just spend one more hour with her. My Mother died 6 years ago. I still miss her everyday. Even now when I call home and my Father answers the phone, I am still surprised to hear him. He NEVER answers the phone -- Mom always does! I wonder if she can see me now -- does she know that I'm doing okay -- that I am doing something that she always knew I would do -- help others? That I am not the screw-up my Father used to tell me I was -- that even today I'm still "My Mother's son"? I can still here her voice in my head. I still say things she used to say when confronted with similar situation. The folks around here say that God called her home -- that her job on Earth was done -- that she is in Heaven. You know, that's all well and good -- but maybe I wasn't finished with her yet! Maybe I needed some more "work" -- God should have asked me before He took her. Sometimes, a boy just HAS to talk with his Mother! One thing, though -- there is something to the belief that people you love really don't "leave" -- they just change plains. An example -- Mom had the greenest thumb of anyone I have ever known. She could grow roses in sand! She LOVED to garden. She would spend hours in her flowers planting, and weeding and talking to her plants. So we always had beautiful flowers growing EVERYWHERE in our yard around the farm house.
Most of her flowers were annuals. Plants that grow for one year and then die with the cold winter. Kentucky (where the farm is) has had VERY cold winters since Mom died. Even so, today -- six years after she died -- the flowers return. The weeds don't grow. Other than trimming the bushes, my Father doesn't do anything to Mom's flowers -- and still they grow. It's as if she were still there tending her garden.
Speaking of flowers, I hope there's a special place in hell for people who steal flowers from graves! I have tried to plant Mom's favorite flowers around her grave, the cemetary allows it, and every time some sub-human piece of filth steals them! What kind of heartless, gutless pile of crap would steal someone's grave flowers? And what would they do with them? Give them to their girlfriend? "Here darling -- some flowers I picked myself this afternoon."
So if you have a Mother, and you don't live at home -- forget about just a phone call or a card -- drop your weekend plans and go see your Mother! Because one day she won't be there -- and all you'll have is a grave stone.
posted by Eric at 12:20 PM
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
Rain, Rain go away! And take those darn tornadoes with you! More storms in the state today! Last night the area around Tupelo got hammered by a tornadic storm. Darn things come in at night! You can't see them, and when you finally hear them -- it's way too late. Haven't heard yet if anyone was hurt or killed. As of last night there were five people missing. I hope they are found and are all right.
What did Tornadoes sound like before there were freight trains?
Tornadoes are proof God hates trailer parks.
The air is so humid and thick you could almost cut it with a knife. They say that today is the last day of rain and stuff for the next three days. Let's hope they are right.
The fence is done! The whole compound is surrounded by a six foot wall of wood and concrete! And it comes just in time! Me thinks that there is ANOTHER Meth Lab going in across the road. Not that I smell anything, I didn't the first time. But now there are cars coming in and out at all hours of the day and night (again) and some of the same cars as before are parking in the driveway -- staying about 15 minutes -- and then getting the hell out of Dodge! I was talking to a friend, who is a friend of people in the area that cook Meth -- he told them that the cops were watching them. THEY ALREADY KNEW! Not only that, BUT THEY DON'T CARE! THEY'RE STILL COOKING METH! I guess that's why they call it dope. It's getting close to election time here, so the Sheriff is going to have to show he's tough on drugs. Get ready for many busts in the next three months or so. Gotta show the voters that the Sheriff is on the job!
I heard about David Lee Roth's capturing of an intruder in his California yard last week. Dave had a shotgun, and the intruder had a knife. Guess who won? When asked about it later, Dave said "Anyone found in my yard after dark bearing arms will be "found" in the morning." I think I'll make a sign that says that, and put it in my yard along with another one that says "Trespassers will be shot -- Survivors will be Prosecuted" and put them in the yard. That should work -- if Meth heads can read.
Two more sets of grades to do and I'm DONE! Another set of shattered dreams, slammed doors and broken hearts! Actually, I don't do that. I got in trouble this year for giving too many A's! Can you believe that? Okay -- let me explain -- at this hallowed hall of Academic excellence at which I teach, my class sizes average between 7 and 15 people. These students that we recruit have (on average) the highest ACT scores of the rest of the incoming Freshmen at the other seven Mississippi state schools. So they are already smart to begin with. With small class sizes, I have the time to work with any student that is having problems. So at the end of the semester (the way I see it) if everyone in the class DOESN'T make an A -- I haven't done my job! And no, I don't "give" A's, the student earns it!
On the other side of the coin, one Instructor in the Division of Math and Science was repremanded and later fired for giving too many F's in his College Algebra class! So if you give too many A's, you get in trouble. Too many F's, and you get fired. Too many B's C's and D's and the students give you Hell. And folks wonder why you can't find many good teachers who stay in teaching anymore!
The last final of the year for me finished 30 minutes ago. So I'm off to average grades! Even though I SUCK at Math, I at least figured out how to average things! And God Bless the inventor of the calculator!
posted by Eric at 12:32 PM
Tuesday, May 06, 2003
Blogger.com is now FAMOUS! They did a story about it on NPR this morning -- the day after I slammed them in the very Blogger.com they were talking about. Coincidence? I THINK NOT!
Still possible severe weather due in the area today. We had a couple near-misses yesterday. Hope the luck holds out. I have lived here for 12 years, and have been through four tornadoes! Two went right over my house! Luckily I live in a strong brick home so I didn't suffer very much damage -- unlike my neighbors in trailers -- excuse me -- manufactured homes -- that went airborne! You know, manufactured homes don't fly very well!
It's finals week! I don't know who's more stressed out -- students or faculty! Sometimes I wonder where these kids were during the year. When I read their papers or grade their tests -- I think they must have been in someone's class -- just not mine. Nothing like shattering someone's dreams with a failing grade to make one feel so low! I wish I could just make up a grade -- but then I'd hear it from the students who EARNED their grade.
What bugs me is the student who either skips or misses many classes -- then when they do show up they don't pay attention. Then they fail their tests -- and when they get their grade, appeal it on the grounds that their instructor is "prejudiced against (insert oppressed minority here)." They get hacked because since they pay tuition and fees they "bought their good grades". No, you bought the opportunity to attend classes and LEARN SOMETHING! If you don't take advantage of that opportunity, the problem is with the person in the mirror. Not the instructor.
Let's see -- the Dixie Chicks open their US tour to standing room only crowds who cheer for their group. Maybe two or three protesters outside the venue. Where's this nationwide backlash against the DC's? Could it be just media hype?
Neat editorial cartoon in last week's paper -- according to the "legal" department, to keep from running afoul of truth in advertising laws, Fox News will now be known as Fox "News".
We made $1,800 for the library with our little murder mystery play! Looks like it's going to be an annual event.
Time to do some more grades! This is the second worst part of teaching! The worst part is all the BS work that you have to do BESIDES teach.
posted by Eric at 12:10 PM
Monday, May 05, 2003
GREETINGS BLOG HEADS! Welcome to Monday! Maybe yours is going well!
Lots of severe weather in the area today -- although not as bad as the local TV station would have you believe. Their new "First Alert" Super Doppler Weather Radar needs calibration. Their "severe rain with hail" on the screen translates to moderate rain on the ground. Listening to the weather babe breathlessly trying to tell you what's happening, you would think that everyone's gonna die! They spent 100's of thousands on this thing -- at least they could calibrate it better.
This past weekend we had the "Market Street Festival" in downtown. They hype it as one of the "35 top festivals in the South". If this is one of the top, then the rest of the festivals must really SUCK! This is what you get to do -- walk around two blocks of hot streets listening to D and E list bands try to play, while eating soggy overpriced food. THEN you get to look at many, many booths of pure dust collecting junk! The classic car show is nice, if you like classic cars. If not, then your pretty much done. The Fire Department will spray you with a hose, for way too much money you can take a 5 minute helicopter ride where you get to look down on all the other schmucks who fell for the hype. THEN after dark, they light up the stage with the "Headline Band" who plays for two hours until 11:00pm when they roll up the sidewalks. This year's headliner: FOGHAT! Lets' see, they had two hits in the mid-70's "Slow Ride" and "Fool for the City." Now it's a bunch of overweight 50-somethings trying to re-create their rock-and-roll past. I guess you have to feel for these guys -- when the only gig you can get is one of the top 35 festivals in the South, you have to know your best years are behind you.
This is just like the other thing they do in this town -- Pilgrimage. Now before you think that this has a religious conotation, think again. Pilgrimage is when the rich folks in town open up their pre-Civil War homes to show them off -- along with their antiques. You pay five bucks, to see how rich some folks pretend to be! (Here, come see my home -- look at all my over-priced, non-functional stuff, let me show off how rich I am -- and YOU PAY TO DO IT! Jeez, makes you want to say "THE CIVIL WAR IS OVER! YOU LOST! GET THE FUCK OVER IT!"
Today starts "Begging Week" for all NPR and PBS stations. This is one of two times a year that Public stations tell you how important you listeners are to them, and how they can't bring you the programming you love without your support. So send them money, and they'll send you a mug, or tote bag or CD case or something like that. I have worked at two NPR stations, and one PBS station -- so believe me when I say -- IT'S ALL BULLSHIT! THEY DON'T NEED YOUR MONEY! Besides, YOU'RE ALREADY PAYING FOR THEIR PROGRAMMING THROUGH THE TAX MONEY THE GOVERNMENT (Federal, State and in some cases, Local) GIVES THEM! If no one sent money to their NPR station, they would not go off the air, they would not lose some of their programming -- NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN! The money you send them (above and beyond what your taxes pay for) goes for staff raises and new, pricey toys for the announcers to play with! IT'S ALL BULLSHIT! If they REALLY want to be "listener supported", then zero out the government money and see how long NPR and PBS would last. Two months, maybe. NPR stations and PBS stations usually pull 2 to 3 shares in every market they serve. True, they scale up -- but Howard Stern on his New York station has more people listening than is listening to ALL of NPR! So call your local PBS or NPR station when they ask for your money and tell them "send me my freaking tote bag -- I have already given you my donation through the tax money you siphon off the public trough." And since I am paying for this programming, SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME LISTEN TO ALL THINGS CONSIDERED!"
Lest you think I am going to rant and rave all this Blog -- you're probably right. However, I shall leave you with this update: The "adult" children of the Meth cookers have moved into the house across from me. Trouble is eating regularly, and the place is turning into "party central" for all their red-neck buddies. You have never seen so many Trans-Ams, Camaros and 4-wheel drive trucks in one place. I look for the cops to be showing up any weekend now.
So save your money -- stay away from Market Street, Pilgrimage and don't send any to NPR or PBS and spend it on yourself! You'll love yourself more for it!
posted by Eric at 12:51 PM
|
